Wednesday, July 30, 2014

Conversation with William the Ghost

He officially has a name!!!

I spent all day after work and this morning with the ghost. I feel bad calling him "the ghost" at this point because it's pretty clear to me he's a 28 year old tan guy who I've gotten to know pretty well. I was calling him "Stellar" because we had several names we'd come up with -William being the most frequent -but weren't 100% certain of his name. 

But this morning as I was getting ready for work we were conversing back and forth a LOT more clearly. I get images and then words come to me -as if someone were speaking them, but psychically. When I try to hear answers and ask questions like, "What year were you born in?" -then I struggle getting answers. But when I'm psychically talking to him like a person, he responds very freely and I get what he's saying. It's still a little muttled from time to time and I kind of have to guess at what he's saying. I actually got the image of a lion at one point and didn't know what it was referring to.

Most of our conversation took place in my bathroom as I was brushing my teeth and putting on my makeup. I was joking around and said, "Welcome to my bathroom -it's the greatest hotel you will ever stay at. This is MY bathroom by the way, so don't try to take it over." He quickly responded with a joke back, "Well I'll make it mine."

At one point I saw a flash of jeweled necklace and he told me, "I'm going to buy you jewelry." So I kind of looked at where I thought he was standing and told him, "Well that's probably going to be challenging for you, but you seem like a determined individual so I won't doubt you." 

When I was at the sink I got the name Casandra "Irvene". It was very clear that that was my last name. I also got the sense he wanted me to look it up online (which I did to no avail). 

I decided to have him pick out my jewelry this morning. I suggested he pick something that matched what I was wearing. Then when I was brushing my hair it felt like I was being pulled -not physically but by an unseen force -towards the bedroom. I realized he was in the hallway and wanted me to see the jewelry he picked out. I told him, "I'm starting to get the sense you're not the most patient of people."

I can tell when he's standing behind me and when he's in the hallway or far away from me. I then went to the bedroom. I have a desk with some jewelry that I usually wear laid out on it so I can grab it quick and be out the door. I have about 6 necklaces to choose from on it. So I stood with my eyes shut in front of the desk and told him to move my hand over the piece he wanted me to wear. My hand pulled out strait, then veered FAR left and I ended up over by the jewelry box I keep on top of my dresser. The hand kept going and almost hit the wall before it circled back to the jewelry box again. I joked with him and said, "Oh am I wearing the wall today?" He said, "It's very fashionable." He then moved my hand over a dark gray, metal necklace which went great with my black cami top and gray sweater.

I then started talking to him and said, "I know you were at work with me yesterday because I felt you tap on my shoulder. We need to find something more productive for you to do at my work during the day." So I told him to stand near my co-worker/friend Andrea and emanate peace towards her since she's having issues with her ex-husband being a jerk right now. I immediately got this sense of sadness hit me and realized the ghost was sad about what Andrea was going through. So I told him, "Yah empathy sucks sometimes." 

I then asked him what he thought of my dad. And I got, "The engineer?" And I said yah, he's a great man and is very loyal and helpful. Then again I got this sens of sadness from him and realized: He doesn't think my dad will ever accept him as my "husband". So I smiled and told him, "Well my sister Emily is cool with us. And my mom seems pretty understanding. and my step-sister Sarah is also aware of what's going on. And that's all you need -just one person who's got your back."

I then told him to find my dad during the day -since he gets frustrated and tired pretty easy -and emanate peace towards him. After a while he'll start to notice and maybe think it's a guardian angel. Then I can tell him, "Actually that's my husband." 

Then I got in my car and headed over to work. I asked him, "So what's your name, I've heard so many at this point." I then got "William" very clearly. So I asked him, "Are you sure your name is William?" And I got a strong, clear "YES". So I said jokingly, "Are you positive???" Then I got the name "Jessica" -and it felt like he was whispering it in my ear. So I said, "No that's my name, you can't have that one." 

When we finally got to work and I pulled into the parking lot, I started getting flashes of images of a being in a horse-drawn carriage and I heard the horses feet trotting. I realized being in the car reminds him of past experiences being in a horse-drawn carriage. 

It was a great morning. I felt taller. I also realized how funny and occasionally flirtatious William can be. But then at work he kept bugging me. It was fine until I went into a 2 hour marketing meeting, which is always a boring place to be. He poked my back repeatedly, touched my arm, and acted like a bored 5 year old trying to get attention. I told him to leave the room. I said, "This is a boring place, go find Emily and hangout with her until I get out. You don't want to stay here." But he didn't leave. After the meeting ended though it felt like he wasn't around or was a little more distant. Or maybe I just got busy focusing on the computer. 

The only other thing to note was that when I was online checking out Facebook posts for the day I came across a meme on Husbands and got a reaction from William -who was standing behind me. He definitely wants me to know he's my husband.

Throughout this whole experience I've basically thought this way: "Well it figures that the kind of guy I'd end up with would be a ghost. I'm unusually spiritual and weird so it all kind of makes sense. Why can't my life be normal? Will this really work out? How can I expect it to -it's not practical. What will people say/think. People will think I'm crazy and they'll treat me like I'm an idiot. But my happiness shouldn't depend on other people's approval or understanding. Most people don't know half the sh*t they claim to and I can PROVE he exists if needed by making him "introduce" himself to them. I don't want to let it go. At least not yet.

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