The Spiritualist and the Psychic Part 1 (2/10/12)

I’d first like to start by making a distinction between the two.

There is an invisible pool most people don’t see. Some people can fall into it by accident, but then they get out and can’t find it again. You can come across spiritual forces by accident, but you can’t stay in the pool if you don’t know where it is.

Then there are Spiritualists. These are people who sense the pool and can sometimes choose to wade in the shallow end of it. They pick up on spiritual forces and have a good sense of intuition –often naturally.

Then there are Psychics –at least the real ones which are few and far between. These people can see the pool. It’s invisible to everyone else, but in there eyes they can see it more clearly than others. These people can, by choice, swim and dive into the deep end.

Spiritualists can become Psychic is they focus on achieving that goal over and extended period of time. Psychics can become Spiritualists or even “normal” if they choose to ignore their gifts.

My friend is a Spiritualist who was friends with a Psychic. She was in between these two states at one point, but has now fallen into the category of Lost Spiritualist. At one point, she and her psychic friend wrote a book that she actually gave to me to read. The Spiritualist is a Pisces (now more like a Cancer since her mother was one) and I was mostly looking to see if there were any similarities between our spiritual beliefs.

The book Nancy wrote was to help herself and others overcome the grieving process. She had lost her mother, father, and her husband. Her psychic friend, who I’ll call Sheila, also had lost loved ones.

The first thing I noticed in Nancy’s writing was her mention of words like: pain, heart, reflections, moments, memories, nature, feeling so deeply, the world, knowledge, path, the sea, plant a seed, transcend, and grief. Those words in general tend to indicate we’re dealing with someone who is focused on Nature, Feelings, The Past, Truth, and Larger Concepts verses Details. She has Water Sign written all over her.

Other things about Nancy we have in common: She believes there is a “greater plan” for people and acknowledges and loves God. She has had experiences with ghosts throughout her life starting at a young age –although her parents told her they didn’t exist because they were Catholic and didn’t believe in them. She loves art –specifically interior design. Her father was born in Egypt so she has always been fascinated by ancient Egypt. She loves the color turquoise and blue. There are times, very often, that she “needs to be alone”. She doesn’t like partying, dating around, going out, being in loud places, or trying to “be social for the sake of appearances”. She’s a home-body and is kind of defensive about it because her more social friends say she’s become a hermit. She says she is intuitive and spiritual, but is somewhat afraid of Christian religious teachings because she was overly-doctrined when she was younger. She loves Buddhism and Hinduism though. She doesn’t believe in Abortion –she’s Pro-life- but she also believes people should have the freedom to make their own choices (my thoughts exactly).

In her book, Nancy mentions feeling like an “orphan” after her parents passed away. I never thought of it like that. Nobody really thinks what it will be like to lose a parent. This mental shift may seem extreme, but I imagine it occurs to lots of people after they’ve lost their parents. Orphan.

“Life forces you to stand up and be strong because it shoves you down making you weak.” It’s a well known concept –what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger- and I think she repeats this ideology and clings to it in the beginning of her book because it’s what helped her overcome the loss and pain of losing her parents. Another way Nancy deals with her grief is by “letting go”. The Serenity Prayer Theorem. Accept what you cannot change and Let it Go.

“Weakness is a strength, not a flaw”. Nancy is guarded about her spirituality and her feelings. When I look at her and she talks about it she reminds me of a little kid that’s been bullied and teased for liking Barney or something. She loves who she is but fears rejection and disapproval so she walls herself up and doesn’t reach out to people because she thinks they won’t understand her. But she knows vulnerability, grace, and emotion are strengths because few people have the courage to show these things openly to others for the same reason she hides them now. She writes her thoughts profoundly, but internally she struggles to live them.

Nancy was closest to her mom. A Cancer mother –there is nothing more nurturing, supportive, or loving than that. And they were both water signs. The two were practically one, connected spiritually, emotionally, and through family. Her dad was much more serious and distant –still loving but less emotional. After her mom passed away, Nancy and her dad grew closer and he softened. Nancy says that when a person you love dies you suffer both emotionally and physically. You feel physically weak, scrambled, and drained. And as far as emotions go –Nancy suggests you be open about them. “Don’t waste time trying to push away your feelings”. She says it’s only sub-missing them and letting them dwell deep within you. It doesn’t solve the problem, it just buries it. When people shove their feelings down, they get cold, apathetic, or even lash out with anger or tears later down the road.

She says you don’t have to be physically strong to be tough. “Sit, breath, and allow your feelings to come –don’t hate yourself for them”. She really stresses contending with emotions and sorting them out because when people don’t they get out of sorts. Nancy also suggests reaching out to dead loved ones through meditation. She says to lie down, let your body fall numb, and listen. She says to try this many times until you feel a “presence”. She says this will be your “spirit guide”.

-This is where our opinions differ a little bit. The Native Americans believed in Spirit Guides that would come to you and tell you things about the future or spiritual truths of the Other Side. But most other native and indigenous tribes do not acknowledge this belief. They believe in connecting to nature spirits and forces to gain insight, but most of that is definitely getting into spirituality that veers from the “right path”. You do NOT talk to nature spirits/ entities/ and beings from the spiritual realm you do not know. You also don’t go out of your way to converse with spirits.

I compare it to walking down a street. You CAN talk to random people you come across, but you WILL at some point run into trouble if a person you talk to is dangerous. Same with spirits. You open that door, anything and anyone can come through. You should NOT go out of your way to communicate with the dead –be it a relative or “spirit guide”. However, if that person is communicating with you and you know who it is or “sense” it well enough to know it is human and means you no harm –then you can communicate with it.

Nancy and her mom are a special case of this. After Nancy’s mom passed away, her mom chose to stay and try to communicate with Nancy. It makes sense. Both she and her mom shared a spiritual connection that only grew stronger spiritually after her mom lost her body and became pure soul. Her mom wanted to stay and make sure her daughter would be alright. Nancy was in a dark state and felt numb, lost, and deeply troubled. Her mom was the only person she had ever connected to spiritually. When she died, Nancy thought she had lost the only meaningful connection she had ever truly had. Her mom gave her signs to show she was still there for her. Then Nancy finally told her mom it was time to go. She told her not to worry about her and to find peace. She said doing that and finally letting go brought a sense of closure and fulfillment to their relationship.

“Grief has a purpose”. Grief allows you to overcome the death of a loved one and find a new way to carry them with you in your life. Don’t try to forget them, remember and appreciate the time you shared with them when they were here. Don’t be afraid to ask others for help and strength when you need it. That’s the only way you’ll create new bonds with people who can fill you with love and hope again.