Connecting to Christ

It seems so strange looking back at my life that Jesus was with me before I had even known His name, and for such a long time I did not know He was there.

As a spiritual person who is now deeply connected to Jesus, it's hard to fathom it.

But then I'm reminded of all the times I had an unwavering compulsion to know more about Christianity and in particular the life of Christ. And in spite of so many people failing to inform me, I never "gave up" and shut that door entirely. And it left me open enough to receive the truth about Him when the right person did come along to help me along.

And then it hurts to remember what a great chasm of faith it felt like to finally embrace Jesus and let Him in. There was a huge gap in that direct connection and it felt like a huge leap. Yet it wasn't, it only appeared that way on my end.

And now I feel stupid looking back like, "How could I not have known?"

At this point in my life I'm actually trying to balance the opposite -have a negative, clingy attachment to Christ. It leads you to feeling like the victim and a lost child in every situation, rather than being divine and empowered yourself. Unfortunately this is the number 1 excuse used by some spiritual practitioners to avoid connecting to external beings on only trying to "be God" yourself.

In reality, God empowers you to know yourself as a piece of God's divinity -not God yourself - and know that you're looked after. You will always be a child in comparison to Jesus, but you'll also know you can venture out on your own and lead a powerful life.

As soon as you detach from that negative attachment and that feeling of "victimhood", you understand that you're standing beside Jesus and He's more like a shadow of light behind you: Guiding, Protecting, Bringing Peace, and Loving You. His presence is like oxygen to the soul.

You can go your life without that divine connection if you like, but for most people it's an illusion. He's already there. He knows you. He's there for you in silence. It's you that isn't taking in and embracing that truth. And it's a saddening chasm when that happens.

Jesus is a part of this. I hate how mocked that name has become. With Buddha, even an atheist would have some level of respect for the name. But not "Jesus". It's mocked too much. And you may as well be saying the same of the word "soul".