Today was my first trip back to church in many months, maybe even a year or more. I was drawn to go back and knew it was time.
When I entered the church I was greeted by to women who worked there and then one of the woman said, "Can I get a hug". It caught me off guard.
I tend to live alone and be very solitary so I don't get much physical affection from people and for a complete stranger to open her arms to me, I wasn't quit expecting it. And I hugged her like a would a relative I hadn't seen for a while or a friend/coworker. But her hug was less timid and a lot warmer.
After she hugged me I walked away and started smiling and feeling very happy, like a kid who was just handed an ice cream cone out of nowhere. I realized pretty early on in the service how disconnected I've become to other people.
I knew this would happen. I left the vertical farm and my coworker/friend-family and knew there was a great risk for becoming cut-off and disjointed from people because of that.
But I realized at church today the best way I interact with people is by praying for them from a distance. I can only connect personally to individuals that I trust -which tend to be few and very authentic. For others, I'd rather keep my distance and love them as a soul without requiring further knowledge of them.
Which is why I love this church. It's warm. The people are caring. I feel God's presence profoundly there. It makes me feel whole. And I can be with people, in a large group, without having to know them or connect with every single one.
Castles
I thought about this the other day after watching another history drama on Netflix. In many cultures over the world, but particularly Europe, there was this pattern that emerged.
A king/ruler would want their homestead to be the epicenter of their entire country and world. A crowned jewel. They wanted foreign diplomats and leaders arriving from other countries to be in awe of their palace and to bow before their glory, wealth, and power.
So they invested heavily in their main kingdom and castles. The people then suffered. The towns most peasants and common folk lived where pretty deplorable and meager. All the wealth went to the epicenter and the few that reigned and ruled there. A very small group of people ever got to see and enjoy the palace and palace life.
Today palaces usually exist as non-profit historical sites. Thousands of people flock and are guided through the corridors of now empty castles and monuments at very little cost to the individual. They exist for everyone and no one. We can see hundreds of these places the world over today, even if we're just looking at photos. They're accessible and free.
It says something about ego. When we set ourselves at the center of the world and say there is nothing worth knowing beyond us, we miss everything. It's hollow. When we open ourselves up in humility to everything that's out there we become more and are filled. Sharing, not hoarding.
I once walked into a man's mansion. He essentially had 2 houses in one. He had the skeleton of a prehistoric cave bear at the foot of his spiral staircase. Dozens of remains of dinosaurs, including fossilized velociraptor eggs.
And I thought, "Is this legal? For someone to own so much privately that the world should be able to see?" Something's seem like they're meant for all of us as people.
Like the Amazon Rainforest. It's not just yours, Brazil. It's essential to the environmental health of the world.
When ISIS ransacked pyramids and tombs in Egypt and destroyed and sold off hundreds of ancient items found, that was a theft to the world.
The more we start to see that everything is for us, the less we'll keep things to ourselves including ourselves.
We're meant to be for each other.
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