Forgotten Epiphany

I had a lightbulb go off the other night before bed and immediately thought, "I should blog this" but then forgot by the next morning. 

I did want to mention I'm disassociating less, connecting more, and having the greatest "elderly mind moments" where I forget within minutes of something negative happening. Something bad will happen, I'll feel angry and frustrated and then I'll forget what it was over and then I'll get of the emotions associated. Like a child throwing a tantrum and not letting go of something they're clinging to only to get distracted and drop the item. This is why I entrust my soul to divine guidance. 

In other news, I'm being led to be less materialistic. This season -even Thanksgiving -feels nothing like the holidays. Christmas doesn't feel like Christmas -it's just dead, vacant, and empty. There's a hollowness. So instead of feeling particularly giving and spiritual I just kind of wanted to get the gift-giving over with. I mailed the packages and finished the shipments within the first week of December. Done. 

And I feel nothing. I felt generous giving things I genuinely thought people would like, but from there it's all apathy. And things/items/objects in general are just surroundings. 

I still want things, like a new house and car in particular, but it's more like I want an upgrade in life and more space and less issues rather than things. 

I also had a day of complaint. One full day of listing off everything in life I'm sick and tired of, which I new was crying from the wound to have it healed. The next day I felt relieved and lifted like all of that was being taken care of. 

In other news,

Being dissatisfied with the state of people is pointless. When evil reigned, people were evil. When the soil is contaminated the plant is contaminated. When Heaven reigns people will be lighter. All will follow suite without trying or having to be taught anything. It'll just happen. So there is a knowing that eventually everyone will have knowing. No more painful ignorance. No more tolerating the intolerable from people's ideologies. Things just flow and no one needs to be told how. 

In other news, creativity is flourishing. It pours from me. I can't stop it and it's most of what I end up doing at work now. I keep getting graphic design projects and contributing to wall art and photos. Most of the time doing creative things is just a small part of my job, but lately it's taken over like my creativity has in general. 

I heard a whisper of the word interior designer or art designer. But I thought, "Nahhhhh... I'm not sure about that. I don't just want to decorate surroundings all my life, I'm too spiritual." But then again it's what I do on the spiritual front. I'm far more concerned with improving the surrounding environment, community, area behind the scenes spiritually than anything else. I'm an interior designer spiritually. 

I redesign my interior landscape as well as that of others. 

It'll be interesting to see how things pan out and where things lead. 

In other news, 

The evils of Hollywood keep coming. Netflix is coming to light right now given its affiliation with Zuckerberg and the Metaverse. Interesting... 

And I watched a teen vampire drama show out of boredom the other day and remembered when I had first watched it the depressing and dark energy affiliated, but from a place of greater indifference watched again but still felt it. It's actually pretty incredible because I tried dissecting it and figuring out where it came from. 

The filter of the show is darker physically when you watch it. Not exactly bright pastel colors. The content of the show is dark -teen drama mixed with vampires murdering people. But none of that is the energy emanated. There is something else. As you watch it the energy just comes through. It's heavy, dark and what I would call mal-intended, evil, demonicish. I'm not sure how they do it. 

And yet if I watch something similar in theme and design it isn't the same energy coming through. Not sure what Netflix is up to on that one. 

In the grand sphere and scope of this, there is what I call "Disney" influence and what I call "Universal Studios" influence. Both are awesome in terms of the movies they've created, but one is clearly darker in nature than the other with what gets produced. And so it is with Disney+ and Netflix. 

Disney is dark behind the scenes and the former VP likely had affiliations with Epstein, but with what they make and put out there, it's light. 

Netflix is just dark. It's docuseries on serial killers, dramas, and shows like Hannibal. At the same time, the darkness isn't inherently bad depending on how you watch it and for what reasons. Same with Universal Studios. 

And so you have balance. You go to Disneyland and ride on Avatar/Pandora or you go to Universal and it's Harry Potter. You don't have to choose, they reflect one another -just in the opposite way. But you do have to keep an eye out: 

Where is there evil in something that presents itself as dark to begin with. 

Where is the evil in something that only presents itself as good. 

You have to look out for Chucky the Doll and Mickey Mouse.