It feels like I'm in a dream, and in this dream I've just gained acknowledgement that it IS a dream I'm in. And I'm like, "Am I crazy for realizing this is a dream? Does anyone else realize this is a dream?" And I look around and NOPE. No one else realizes we're all in a dream. And so I go on the internet in this dream and try to find proof that I'm in a dream through external validation and it comes in 2 forms:
1. Ongoing messages from God as to my Calling and the Wake of Reality
2. A FEW souls on this planet that are also tuned into what's happening
So I look around and wonder, what the Hell is "life" on this planet anyway? and I've come to the conclusion that life on Earth should be Pre-Heaven. ALL it is, is life BEFORE Heaven that comes From Heaven. This is Limbo. This is the state of waiting and learning to get into Heaven.
But everyone else acts the opposite. For everyone else THIS is the only reality there is and Heaven is a distant concept that is of no real import right now.
I feel like I'm on a classroom and everyone's focused on the lesson and I walk up to the teacher and share what I know about the subject and she then asks me to Teach HER as if she were the student. And I'm not a teacher! I'm just a kid in a class made aware of certain things I acknowledge as Truths other people CAN know.
Why does no one else see the things I see? Or why do so FEW pay any attention or understand spiritually what's going on?
Why is it EVERYONE freaked out over 2012 and the Mayan Calendar but FEW ever bothered actually understanding what it was saying or what was being implied by the Mayans?
I've been LED to this point. I was MEANT to understand the reality of this situation called "life on Earth". It's BIG and I feel ALONE, but ultimately I cling to the fact that it's all GOOD news. If it were bad news I don't know what I'd do with myself. Thankfully it is all Good.
***Issues I've run into so far on this journey:
1. Self Doubt and a Questioning of the "ME" in this Big Picture Scenario
2. Clinging to Desire for Logical Proof to help reassure me with Issue# 1
3. Attempting to share my findings with people has hit a road block because at some point I realized people either aren't in the right frame of mind of understanding to really take in what I'm sharing or they don't care
4. Too FEW people are on the same page, I need more people
5. I left my job to pursue this that's MY level of certainty, but how will I make money? Not entirely certain, leaving it up to God since I was told from above that it Would be taken care of.
6. Knowing the areas in which my mental capacity for knowing currently run short. There are aspects to the Bigger Picture that include Geometric Principles, Complex Mathematical Structures, and Things I can't quite begin to Fathom. And I'm cool with this because trying to figure it all out now gives me a headache.
7. Talking to religious people. I never thought I'd run into issues discussing religion with Religious people. Instead I share things I've learned and they tell me I'm either right or wrong -as if I was reading incorrectly from a text book when in reality I'm receiving word from the Holy Spirit and Visual/Logical proof from external sources. I feel like I have to choose between the religion of the person I'm talking to or what I KNOW is right.
It's like knowing the Basics of physics and then being divinely led to understand things By physics then trying to explain these things to a physics professor who tells me I'm RIGHT about things I could NOT have known on my own given my limited for-knowledge and yet WRONG about pre-conceived notions that THEY have wrong based on misunderstandings I can't explain to them without opening a huge can of worms.
Conclusion: I am to go out on my path, I am to speak SELDOM of the knowledge I've been given (and only to people I know I can trust), and I am to PROVE with my actions what I know is the Truth about spiritual principles and reality.
Then when I'm REALLLLLY old right before I die I publish a couple books explaining EVERYTHING I've learned, hand over ALL the Truth I've accumulated, and then DIE and just let people make their own peace with the truth like I have.