This morning I felt a little conflicted. My friend Chelsie just gave me a new necklace for my birthday that she assembled herself. It's a black linked chain with a gold pendant at the end. The gold pendant has a Roman Numeral clock with a fairy in the center that looks like Tinkerbell. It's a Peter Pan themed pendant.
Normally I wear my blue cross, but I really liked the way the pendant went with my outfit, so I wore that instead -kind of wondering if anything bad would happen today with my choice of one over the other.
Toastmasters went well but it was all downhill from there.
My Marketing Manager recently found a new job and today I started receiving the emails that used to go to her. 50% were junk -which was hard for me to discern. What is junk mail to some maybe treasure mail to others.
Then I started getting lots of emails about new roles I was going to have to fill since she is no longer a part of our company. Basically more responsibilities with the same amount of pay.
I was starting to feel kind of stressed/depressed after an hour of email sifting and more and more work piling up. Then I checked my personal email... Surprise! Despite the fact that I had purposely assigned roles for the next month of Toastmasters the TM for this week decided to change everything and start assigning roles on her own independent of the schedule. Since I have to send out the week's list of roles this threw me off and stressed me out more.
I was starting to feel really depressed -which I mostly acquainted with the fact that I hadn't taken my medication in a day or two (I forget every once in a while).
Then it was time for lunch.
Out of nowhere my friend who I'd been hoping would go to see the therapist asked me what her number was. I was instantly happy.
I got in the car and Goo Goo Dolls was playing -which I barely noticed. I was still feeling pretty low about everything. Then I looked up in the sky and saw a cloud that looked strangely similar to a silhouette of a fairy -which I thought was weird. Then a bus pulled up alongside the car and my eyes immediately shot to the symbol of the snake intertwined around the staff -a Biblical reference.
I got this weird feeling like God was trying to connect to me. I connected the fairy in the sky to the one I was wearing and the symbol of the staff -which Christ associated with His own cross. And I think what God was trying to tell me was a symbol is just a symbol -it's what it means to you. You can wear any symbol you choose to represent for Me. As long as it represents Me I'll understand. You carry God within you not around your neck. Symbols have evolved lots of times to represents dozens of different thinks -like the swastika/Tibetan sign for prosperity. It's what it means to you and what you use it for.
After that everything felt alright. My day may not be going well but God letting me know He's there makes my day -even a crappy one -worth having.