Gold/Faith/Mourning

Finally, my topics for this week have arrived...

Gold

Having thusly joined a Financial Service company, it is amazing to me how many wealthy people know the secrets to growing tax free funds for retirement. They already make more than other people, but then they also Save more than other people. I know the rich complain about taxes, but at least they can afford to pay them.

I drove past a wealthy neighborhood today, and all I could think was, "Well now what?" You've accumulated all that money. You're living in a wealthy neighborhood. You have a nice family. Maybe you donate to charities every once in a while. Now what? You still work until you retire, but Now What??? What are you doing with your life. When it comes time to cash out and transfer funds from this life to the next, what the hell are you going to pay with?

Money means nothing to your soul. It means a lot to your comfort level in life and how well you can manage to distract yourself fr your soul with worldly accommodations, but Nothing to your Soul. It's never about how rich you are -people can sell themselves and hand over their lives an everything they believe in for getting rich. It's not an accomplishment. It's just something that some people would give anything for. It's never about fame -Being famous can be easy, just look at Youtube and Snooki. It doesn't mean you've accomplished anything. At the end of the day, it's not how much money you have or how famous you are, it's What You Do With It. A fireman never makes much money, but he saves lives and therefore hi is automatically worth more to those around him. That's real Value. Your things may have a Price, but it should always be you that has Value.

Faith

It's hard for me to differentiate between Faith and Hope. They are either the same word or two separate things working simultaneously. For me, Hope is what I discussed in an earlier blog. It's a Knowing of Uncertainty. This will happen -I don't know how or by what means, but this will happen. Hope applies to future things that have not yet come to pass. It is needed to uplift and sustain belief in something you have faith in. Faith is therefore something you invest into Hope. You can't have Hope without Faith.

Faith is more of a spiritual investment towards a belief -especially one that is unseen, has not occurred yet, or is doubted on by others. I have Faith that everything will be alright. I Hope that everything will be alright. You can have hope, but usually people just hope. You can have faith, but you can't say faith is an act. It's either something you have or something you don't. You can act on your faith, but that doesn't make faith an act. My brain is currently getting caught up in the logistics of the word. Time to untangle...

Ultimately Faith is that thing close to Hope that keeps people going -sometimes the only thing that keeps them going -when darkness seeps in. It is a need. You need to have Faith. Those without faith in themselves, in others, in God, in the world, in life, in something... are lost and empty. People need Faith.

Mourning

Mourning is a weird thing. For me, I close up. I go numb. I get frigid and vacant emotionally. I clock out. I become distant. At least for a day or two. Then when reality comes pounding through the door with funeral arrangements and relatives arguing or crying and there's a service to go to... it all hits like a ton of bricks. I break down. I don't really know why a first. Anything can set me off when the pile is stacked that high, so it won't initially make sense why all the sudden I've caved in. And everything falls.

At some point my thoughts will return to the reason. I will miss that person and wonder what the hell I'm going to do without them around. I feel sad and afraid. I don't know who to talk to. Luckily my sister is usually around going through exactly what I am. We cling close to each other. And at the funeral we sit and cry silently. I'm usually frustrated over the fact that random verses from the Bible are being read. Generic words about mourning and letting go. It isn't until a family member comes up to speak that I tune back in to what's being said. And then we reminisce. We remember the reason why we're all there. Before all of my thoughts were on the Loss, but here my thoughts turn back to the Life. I remember and appreciate those times.

By the end, I keep saying the same thing over and over to myself. She was loved. She is loved. She will always be loved. Wherever she is, God is looking out for her and taking care of her the way He always has. She is Loved. She will always be taken care of.

And through these thoughts I find peace and let go.